Malam Lebaran Haji

Pukul 9 malam, suasana gang rumah mertua begitu gaduh dan riuh dengan tabuh genderang plastik dibawa dengan khidmat oleh anak-anak setempat. Dawai yang sedang asyik mengunyah bakso pun terdistraksi, berlari mengambil sepatu silver lusuh kesayangannya dan ngabur keluar rumah. Untung dengan sigap sang Mama, ditangkaplah anak semata wayang (belum tau nambah atau engga) nya itu. Mungkin 10-15 anggota akamsi yang sorak sorai bertakbir medley  aku rapopo menggemakan suara seadanya namun penuh energi hingga kepala si mama pun jadi pening. Memang pening, tapi cukup mengisi loneliness di dalam hati. Kangmas masih di travel menunggu panggilan waiting list. Dinginnya bandung cukup membikin gentar. Mungkin misua datang saat adzan subuh berkumandang. Tahik.

Sudah makan atau belum? kangmas tak berkabar. Tapi wayahnya harus tidur. Menunggu hanya ngabisin waktu hidup. lebih baik melanjutkannya di bunga tidur. Eh, malah nulis blog. Sudah lama juga ga bersua di rancah perblogan. Apa kabar, aku baik, yeee..ga ada yang nanya. Alhamdullilah. Masih baik. 

Saya sudah officially resigned dari dunia desain ahensi dan menjadi ibu yang mengejar cita-cita. Cita-cita ingin jadi orang kaya, siapa yang engga. Sesekali ingin cèlfie di blog sendiri. Gak sesekali juga, kan memang sering. Yang liat juga sendiri. Hmm..i doubt my self esteem again and again, and it will happen all over and over again. i'll write this to cheer me up in the future. Cause i've been through exactly the same circumstances and i never learned about it. So here I go. 

Dear Mama Dawai, 

you always cry for some reasons that frankly it's never been big problems for your life. usually, you always talk bluntyto people who never knew you, and they would judge you as a crybaby. Therefore they mocked you behind your back, talked about you so badly, cause you're too honest to those fucking people. They do not need your honesty, they do not need your story, they do not need you. But anyway, you don't need them as well! c'mon girl, you're brighter than them, you're just too naive for keeping them in. They are the real pretentious. 

When you need to talk, just go to the Almighty or your real bestfriend. Bestfriend never fails you in any situation.  they understand you in lots of ways. They support and give advices with cares no matter what. You should re-arrange who will listen your heart broken and who doesn't. 

You're stronger. You're smart. You deserve better friends. Just be a nice person, but remember..keep your friends close, your enemy closer. 

Love, 

Acha.